


Mouth So Dirty

by tayrulez



Series: Whatever, Wait 'Til We're in Private [2]
Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Ficlet Collection, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-21
Updated: 2020-09-24
Packaged: 2021-03-08 02:14:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 758
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26587954
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tayrulez/pseuds/tayrulez
Summary: quick ficlets where the innuendos go a little farther...
Relationships: Dan Howell/Phil Lester
Series: Whatever, Wait 'Til We're in Private [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1934128
Kudos: 2





	1. Christmas Cracker

**Author's Note:**

> I found these on my old computer from 2017

Pulling a Christmas cracker, Dan wins and gets an eight-centimeter ruler with some shape stencils. Phil laughs with a mischievous twinkle in his eye. In a slightly deeper voice than he normally uses, Phil scoots over and questions his friend, “What’re you gonna measure, Dan?”

Dan’s face flushes instantly. He glances over to Phil, hoping his friend is ready to just go on with the next activity. No such luck. His best friend waggles his eyebrows and looms in closer. He not so subtlety adjusts the waistline of his pants and whispers eagerly.

“I know what I’d be measuring.”

Dan stares back, gaping, unsure of what to say to that. Phil stands abruptly, smugly walking away to either the bathroom or his bedroom. Dan gulps and looks down at his own pants. He weakly turns to the camera. In a breaking voice, he tells his audience, “Sorry, but I’m deleting that.”


	2. Wanna Dance?

Dan, Phil, PJ, Jon, Thomas, Louise, Mark, and Sean are having a barbeque party. There is alcohol involved, and usually this means Phil isn’t drinking. On the contrary, he drinks a bit, though not enough to actually get drunk. He is a little buzzed and is dancing with Louise. Dan is slightly drunk, sitting on a bench with Sean and PJ. Dan is holding his hotdog, not actually eating it as he watches Phil.

The black-haired boy seems to sense someone is watching him, even in his intoxicated state. His head snaps back and immediately catches Dan’s gaze – though the younger looks away just as quickly. Still, Phil maneuvers himself through the maze of feet and slumps down almost on Dan’s lap.

“C’mon, Danny. Don’t you wanna dance?”

“I don’t like parties, Phil.”

Dan grumbles, reminding the older that he hadn’t wanted to come in the first place. Phil doesn’t seem to catch on. He leaps up, trying to drag Dan to the dance floor, but he fails since their strength is weakened by the alcohol and tiredness. Phil bellyaches again.

“You wanna dance?” Phil cries out again, whining impatiently.

“You want a sausage slapped across your face?” Dan groans, holding up his hotdog.

Phil ponders the question a moment and leans in toward Dan. “Sure.”

Dan gapes and drops the hotdog. Phil frowns and says something about Dan doing it wrong, but the younger boy zones him out, feeling a bit disturbed. He wants to leave.


	3. Tattoos

Dan and Phil have their hair dyed and are wearing stick-on piercings for a Punk Edits video. They are also wearing tattoo sleeves, and Dan has found a fiery dragon sleeve, showing it off to Phil. His eyes light up in a childlike manner and he snatches it before removing the one already on his arm.

“Goodbye, naked lady. Thanks for riding my arm.” He speaks without thinking.

He realizes quickly though and catches Dan’s bewildered gaze before cracking a smile. Dan smirks in return, unsure of what he could possibly say in retaliation. Phil purses his lips as he slides on the dragon sleeve.

“Naked ladies aren’t the only thing riding my arm today.”

“Phil!”

Several minutes later, they are applying temporary tattoos on their necks. Phil helps Dan first, soaking the younger boy’s trousers along the way.

“Phil! You’ve made me look like I’ve gone on my pants.”

Phil looks down and chuckles suggestively. “Oopssss.”

He lingers on the ‘s’ a little longer as he runs the sponge by again. He continues to apply the tattoo, causing Dan to shiver as the excess water dribbles down Dan’s shirt. He doesn’t say anything else, just closing his eyes and shivering. Phil chuckles. Finally, Dan has his tattoo and it is his turn to apply Phil’s. The sponge against his skin feels good and he can’t help but let out a low moan, similar to when Dan tries their baking creations. Dan’s hand trembles a little as Phil begins to touch his body.

“Ah, my nipples!”

Dan freezes up and almost drops everything. Phil’s shout had almost sounded like an orgasm and Dan starts sweating feverishly. There is going to be some editing done to this video, he can already tell. Phil is still touching his body, as if itching to rip off his shirt. Dan gulps and Phil stands suddenly.

“Shit.” He mutters under his breath before turning away and speaking clearer. “I need to, go to the bathroom. Now.”

Phil unzips his pants in the lounge, running toward the bathroom down the hall. Dan lets out a relieved gasp and follows him after he turns off the camera.


End file.
